I have a confession to make . . .

I’m freaking out a bit.

You see, I’ve agreed to be one of several authors at a  local venue next week for a book signing! What the hell was I thinking?

I have personally witnessed book signings (by others) about four times in my entire life. Two of those times were for my indie author husband, where my participation involved ironing the table covers and making sure there were cookies for his “fans.” Not exactly activities I could include on my resume as “book signing experience.”

What I do know:

Bring 10,000 copies of my book, “Bosses and Blackjacks: A Tale of the ‘Bloody Fifth’ in Philadelphia”                                                                  Wait a minute . . . did I say 10,000? . . .  I meant 10.

Bring a pen (that works). On second thought —better bring two.

Bring a table cover (freshly ironed, of course)

Bring the clever(?) bookmarks I spent hours designing and re-designing to give away to anyone who gets within three miles of my table. (I do know how to make paper airplanes!)

Bring business cards — to make it easy for reps from those big publishing houses and movie moguls to contact me day or night! (Think positive…think positive…think positive)

Bring a stiff upper lip —so I don’t dissolve into a puddle of disappointment if no one shows up — or worse, if people show up, but no one buys my book…or, God forbid, doesn’t even talk to me.

Oh damn! I almost forgot —bring cookies!


Seriously folks . . . if any of you, Dear Readers, have  helpful  advice to get me through this horror show called “A Book Signing,” I will be checking back every day for the next week to read your comments.

It’s so weird — I keep hearing Madonna’s “Like A Virgin” in my head. Sorry to leave you with that ear-worm!


10 thoughts on “A BABE IN THE WOODS”

    1. Going to be in Audubon, NJ…at the Tree House Coffee Shop, Sunday, August 14th, 12-3 p.m. It would be a bit of a trip for you, but I appreciate the sentiment! Some day we do have to have a drink and talk over old times! hahaha

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I admire you for taking the leap. I now that I’m SUPPOSED to do these things, but I don’t know that I can. (And, of course, there’s the poor-planning aspect that my books are only in digital form, so the only thing that I could sign is perhaps somebody’s Internet bill.) Still, best of luck!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for the pep talk, Brian! Now, if you’ll send me your address, I’ve got a pile of IOUs you can sign as a practice round! (FYI: I believe someone has created a virtual book-signing procedure for digital books!)

      Liked by 1 person

      1. A virtual procedure? Thanks for the tip, now I’m off to do some googling (and 5 hours later I won’t remember why I sat down in the first place but I’ll know everything I need to know about turtles in the Galapagos Islands…)

        Liked by 1 person

  2. You sound very prepared. I’d suggest a blackjack to keep visitors in place. I wanted to be there for you, but I have a family thing. Damn relatives. 🙂 Best of luck. Do I say, “Break a leg.”?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You will be missed, Vanessa! I don’t happen to own a blackjack…you don’t happen to have one handy, do you? Thanks for the good wishes! (I don’t know if “Break a Leg” is appropriate in this circumstance, although I will have to do some acting to convince people I know what I’m doing! hahaha)


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